So busy

I feel like I haven't posted in forever. It's been a busy time for work and my mom was in town over the weekend as well. We had a good time, but I was emotional after she left and cried to my bf. I know time of month exaggerated it, but sometimes the fact that I live far away and the rest of my family lives within 5 miles of each other makes me sad. I feel like I miss out on a lot of things, especially with airfare being so expensive now. I am going there next weekend to see the kiddos all dressed up for Halloween so that will be fun.

I saw my psychologist yesterday. It was a good session. I thought everything was going pretty smoothly in my life, and it is for the most part, but she made me realize that all the little things that are going on are manageable by themselves but put together they can be a little overwhelming. And it's ok that I get a little anxious as long as I have ways to cope and calm myself down. And I do. I have words and thoughts that I can say to myself to make myself realize the sky is not falling and even something really challenging came along I will be ok.

I am ready for the holidays to get here. This is the first time that I really have someone special to share them with and I can't wait. I have always been like the 7th wheel at family events and alone at the holiday parties and to have him, who I have jokingly called my man candy (only to him), will make me so happy. Of course a shiny sparkly ring on my left hand would be icing on the cake.

Hump Day

I was just getting ready to post when my bf came in the room and asked me to put my computer down for a few minutes. I thought we were going to cuddle but apparently he had other ideas. And I was all dressed for the gym and am now sweaty with weak legs. Oh well, sex is better than the elliptical any day.

Passing

My grandfather passed away yesterday. This is my mom's dad and while we knew this was coming, it still is upsetting. His quality of life had declined dramatically so I do believe it is for the best, but I think about the good times and it makes me sad.

I will be flying to California to meet my mom there for the funeral. She told me I didn't have to go but I it did not feel right. I want to be there to support her.

I have one grandparent left, my dad's mom who is about to turn 94. I don't want to even think about her dying one day... that will be devastating.

Two Thumbs Up

BF and I had friends over for dinner last night- a single girl and a couple. BF and the single girl had met, but the couple an bf had not. There was not any reason for this, it just had not happened yet. Well, it turned out really great; good food and good conversation.

Across the board we both like each others friends and families. I think one of his friends is sort of boring but he knows that. The thing is, he hates one of my good friends and because of this our friendship has suffered. They were supposed to do business together and it did not work out and now I am caught in the middle. I have learned my lesson to not mix friends and business (although he is working for my parents), but I hate the fact that I can't see her with him, or even that when I want to see her I get snide remarks from him.

What do you do in this situation, when you know you will never be able to socialize as couples?

Straightening up

My cleaning lady is coming tomorrow. She has only come once before and is awesome. We have her every other week, but the hurricane and lack of power for 3 Saturdays set us back so now the house is a mess again.

So now I will do what many women I know do: I will clean in preparation for her arrival. It seems silly in a way because I am paying her to do it, but there is just something about having a near stranger inspect your house and find it too messy. Or maybe it is just that if I don't pre-clean she will never make a dent in it.

I will devote a few hours today to throwing away papers, loading the dishwasher, putting books and various other items where they belong, and doing laundry. The laundry gets done every weekend anyway so I guess I can't count that as anything extra.

And oh I just can't wait until tomorrow evening when I have a nice clean home... at least for 72 hours or so.